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Vive La Difference

Extracts from the writings of Martin Plimmer and Michael Magenis on the differences between men and women.

cups and spoons

Women care deeply about cups and spoons, yet they mix gloss paint in a cup with a spoon. Men would never do that, even though they don't give a toss about a cup or a spoon.

cooking

Women cook to feed their family and friends. Men cook because it means they don't have to do the washing up.

clothes

Women like to wear other people's clothes. Men don't like other people wearing their clothes. Women like to wear men's clothes which they keep forever. The exception is the dressing gown, which they return with the sleeves rolled up, which is annoying the next time the man puts it on. Men only wear other people's clothes when dressing up as women.

temperature

Woman have to be another temperature to what it is. If it goes plus or minus one degree they are either freezing or boiling. Usually they are freezing, even though they are wearing their man's coat.

compatibility

Women know the exact number in their children 's class, the name of the teacher and what days they have to take the PE kit. Men know the quickest route to Doncaster avoiding Northampton. Without each other men and women would be lost.


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